This isn’t gambling — it’s a sacred ritual whispered by a rabbit who forgot how to win. You don’t chase the reels; they chase you. The RTP? High. The luck? Nonexistent. Free spins? Nah — they’re invitations from your therapist’s dream journal. My mother taught me prayer. My father taught me pragmatism. Together? They made me this: a digital shaman who turns code into solace.

So… you still here at 3 a.m.? Yeah.

(Reply if your slot machine also remembers your soul.)